Thursday, November 29, 2007

YES I'M UNIQUE.
im like the only person i know in my circle of friends to fail auto driving test 1st try. that feeling is worse than failing any other tests. it's like, high hopes from everyone, instructor even higher hopes, mum even HIGHER hopes cuz the pple around her, the sons passed at 1st try MANUAL. i still can't accept this failure. seriously i'm not taking it well. dun talk to me about driving test or i'll kick your ass.

that traumatic feeling, having so much confidence, and becuz of one tiny mishap it screwed up my whole test. man i really hate kerbs now. and the worse thing is bring practical, my mum feels that i really suck cuz i couldnt pass at first time when her friends' sons and daughters did.

even my friends around me also are as lucky. even though stats showed that only 48% auto driving candidates pass at first attempt, the fact is that pple around me pass at their first try.

am i really that lousy?

if i were i would be ok to accept the fact that i failed. but i swear im not. not like im trying to be ya ya, but i mean when you control the car you obviously know whether you cmi or not.

haix. maybe im over reacting cuz there are pple also who don't pass at first attempt in singapore, but really i dunno how to explain the pressure im facing.

BUT anyways, i was quite consoled cuz my dad brought me out for supper at night. turns out that my dad, the one im always quarrelling with, became the light at the end of my nightmare. it was really sweet to bring me out to relax. he told me he did not believe pple could easily get first attempt pass in any driving test, becuz he knew the harshness of the tester. and he felt that pple should not be judged by how many attempts they take to pass. he was even glad i did not knock someone down while taking the test. ha!

no matter what im quite surprised that he was the one that came to my rescue during my nightmare and depression. after all he's a driver himself, im glad he could feel for me and nt blame me for the money i wasted learning driving.

sadly, tmr i will be leaving home for roughly 1 month, with only a few times which i can come home. i'll miss home, and im sadder cuz i hate to leave at this point of time when my mum's still sore abt my failure and when my dad just touched my heart. hahas. a bit ): but yeah, for hall 15. and it's my choice to take up that post. (see pple go overseas, damn envious!)

i'm leaving the mess behind, but bringing an unsolved burden with me.

be DIFFERENT.
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Sunday, November 18, 2007

these days everyone's mugging real hard. i can feel that pressure from hall already. that's why i prefer to mug there than at home. because at home i feel like i'm on holiday and all i should be doing is sleep and watch tv and surf the net.

in hall it's like, damn weird if im the only one slacking right? ha. good psychology, gets me to study.

and you start to see the anti-social side of very sociable people. lol.

oh yeah back to the fetish of mugging for exams in hall, obviously my dad can't take it too well. he's been giving me trouble for spending too much time in hall. my god, it's not even the IH period yet, EXAMS leh, also can't cut me some slack, can you imagine when december comes?

on a lighter note, you know when you get super stressed, (admit this) you'd start thinking of your eye candy ;)

haha. i miss mine.

haven't been talking to that candy for a long long time ): i wish wai was in hall, we'd definitely be squealing and going gaga over our eye candies!

by the way, i still miss shopping with wansu! she's one girl who wouldn't just walk past shops in bugis street, most of the time she'd definitely go in take a look, try out some stuff, and even considering buying.

LIKE ME!! ((:

so that i wun feel lonely spending money alone (or even guilty), and have that feeling that my other shopping kaki is getting bored and omg i feel so stress. wahpiang that kind of feeling is real bad.

prolly cuz wansu spends money easily. LIKE ME!! ((:

p/s i still haven gone visiting hall 16 frens' room. haha. diana! hong li!

be DIFFERENT.
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Thursday, November 15, 2007

perfect by nature
icons of self indulgence
just what we all need
more lies about a world that

never was and never will be
have you no shame don't you see me
you know you've got everybody fooled

look here she comes now
bow down and stare in wonder
oh how we love you
no flaws when you're pretending
but now i know she

never was and never will be
you don't know how you've betrayed me
and somehow you've got everybody fooled

without the mask where will you hide
can't find yourself lost in your lie

i know the truth now
i know who you are
and i don't love you anymore

it never was and never will be
you don't know how you've betrayed me
and somehow you've got everybody fooled

it never was and never will be
you're not real and you can't save me
somehow now you're everybody's fool

-everybody's fool (evanescence)

be DIFFERENT.
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